In the Epics of Lord of the Rings, Gandalf once said:
Your fight will start, when all is lost on the third day look to the west, from there hope will come.
If the sun has not rise from the west, then there is always hope, you just have to find it. There is power stronger than the weapons you have, wiser than all of your knowledge and greater than all the elements combine. It is given only to the human race, it differs us from the angels, demons and beast. it gives us a meaning to survive and live the worst. it is hope, determination, and belief. such things can not be thought from man to man, but must be learned through experience.
An old Chinese Scholar said: NOTHING could stop the man with the right mental problem, and yet NOTHING could stop the man with the wrong mental problem
Venue: International Islamic University
I’ve been in a day dreaming mood ever since in the bus. As I walked to CAC for our registration I met with Faiz, my trainer from the CFS Open Debate, whom was also our former judge from last years debate league.
I asked him what teams have already registered. KISAS hasn’t shown up yet. Looking up at the names of the KISAS debaters, there I saw Iman’s name, team B KISAS. Faiz was partially shocked to hear that we split up. He even knew that Nafeesa was the teacher for SRI Ayesha. I thought I wanted to smack his face for saying that in front of me. It’s hard going through all this; it’s even harder hearing people actually don’t care about saying it in your face.
But I’m not the type of person who’s that too emotional. Life has thought me that emotions do little but actions and words do a lot. Then Azizul came to me and said the most absurd thing of thinking that we could actually go to the finals. Insyaallah, I hope.
Once we registered our school’s team, I quickly nabbed the days ratio, frantically my picture as last years finalist was in there, and Alhamdullillah they finally got our school name right. I showed it to all the newbie, bragging whether they could make it to the finals like I did, frantically Azizul said he would plus being best speaker too, Hafeeza just stayed quiet, wonder what she’s thinking about, Amira and Raihan took the ratio to see my picture (plus Iman, Wani and Nafeesa, last year’s whole team to be precise) and Tasnim just smiled at the exclamation. I was so excited.
We got to our rooms and this time the rooms were brand new! Much, much more different than the ones four years ago. Ahh, how time flies. Surprisingly, the girls block was just on the other side of the road. We did our solat Jumaat at the blue mosque of IIU and I met up with Ustaz Zainaphi and Ustaz Mahathir, they were the judges for the MTQ Wani was competing in, which was only in SBPI Gombak, a block away from IIU.
It came to me that it was really by chance Wani could actually join us after her MTQ because it was situated there, any farther and we would be having a hard time picking up her that is if we were able to pick her up. Thank the One who created the Heavens and the Earth. I even thought of driving a car to get her, mind you I could drive now even though I don’t have a license, but after some discussion, she said she would find her own way to get to IIU without my help.
After Jumaat Prayers, I stumbled with my little brother. Last year I had to baby sit them but thankfully not this year. This time my senior, Muhammad is going to do that work for me. There was Syed from the previous year. Someone new this year: Rahman, I feel like I just want to whack him on the head. He keeps on questioning whatever I do even more than Syed. Fattah really had quite a team, all very talkative.
We went to Burger King which was across the road. The SRI Ayeshan’s could live without some junk food. “Anak- anak Kaya” my mom once said. There new teacher, which I just met, Brother Zaki. He was just 8 years older than me, so to me, he was more like a brother than a teacher, he even treats me like one. We went to Burger King by his car. On the way I got a glimpse of SBPI Gombak. It so close yet so far.
It was around 4.00 pm, I’ve just arrived back to my room, with some treats for my juniors. It was quiet, too quiet maybe. Where was everyone? The BM debaters were gone, maybe for their training or something, that’s what Afzal told me. Arif and Azizul were still inside the room, Azizul was sleeping of course, tired I presume.
Arif came rushing towards me; he wanted to do training to. He looked so excited, maybe too excited, just like the bm debaters were doing. We called the girls, and reluctantly for myself, we agreed to meet in the front. Arif told e that Amira brought a laptop, she got it from her mother, whom was a teacher for another type of school competing, hope we don’t stumble with them or else they’ll have a hard time with us.
We packed some debate equipment and went to the front gate, there I could already see Raihan and Amira under the wakaf, built next to the bus stop. Hafeeza hasn’t been seen yet.
We all gather up,Raihan, Amira and Arif started discussing what should they do for their training and what to expect tomorrow. Azizul was making a joke about how girls were always late, wearing makeup and all, I laughed at it of course.
A few minutes past, then came Hafeeza with our little juniors, Ulfah and Laila. Hafeeza was smiles always, while Ulfah was talking to Laila, wonder what they are talking about, rule number one about girls, never ask what they are thinking, this Nafeesa thought me. We regrouped and quickly planned on where we want to do our training. Azizul without hesitation quickly pointed that because I was the only one that knew IIU I should just take them to whatever place I knew would be great to train. Yeah right, when was the last time I came here, of course, a year ago. I just hope my memory won’t disappoint me.
We could wait for Tasnim because she was sick and Syazwani Jr. had to keep her company. We walk along the road, they followed me of course, I didn’t knew where I was going, I saw a tunnel going under the road, it looked familiar somehow, of course, my first time coming to IIU me and Asyraf went scavenging around the place during dark, we got caught by the committee members and was brought straight to our rooms. What a laugh.
I was leading the company till at one point, it seemed like I’ve just walk a mile. Where in the world was I? the others looked at me, they of course didn’t knew anything about this place. It was Raihan who acted quickly, accompanied by Amira, they asked some old guy where was the entrance to the faculty of Engineering. It wasn’t far, and to think I got lost. We met up with the BM debaters and saw Amarul training them outside one of the debate rooms.
We found this neat air-condition room which was in the shape of a class. And this is where the all the real fun starts, training. Hafeeza, Raihan and Amira wanted me to teach them how to find issues in a motion, it was crucial I thought for both Hafeeza and Amira, as they will be the first speaker, and for Raihan because she’ll be doing the reply speech. Azizul and Arif started opening the Amira’s laptop, they quickly jabbed the wireless broadband connecter, and before long was surfing the internet.
I thought them as much as I could; maybe I was too fast in explaining the theories involved. I gave them simple exercise, finding power words and stock issues, I hope they understand, especially Hafeeza, and I really hope Wani was here, she might be able to explain them more better. They were excited when some of the exercises I gave them, was right, it’s a step I thought, a step to history.
It was late, almost Maghrib. Tonight there will be the annual Grand Dinner at the IIU main hall. It was always exciting. We quickly dashed back to the hostels. By the time we made it in front of the gates, the ushers were hushing us so that we would be a little faster, red faced, embarrassing, there were already groups of students waiting for a ride on the bus, we had to move quick.
Grand Dinner, 7.30 pm
Alhamdullillah, we made it in time. As usual, this year we also had to wear our school baju batik. Ohh how I would love to wear anything other than this. The grand dinner was, well grand. I didn’t quite understand it much, but there seemed to be some technical difficulties, never had this like last year. Students were all crowding at the main entrance hall. Of course I didn’t want to waste my team, I did the nonly thing a guy with a camera could do, I took some pictures of course. These were memorable moments I knew, this was going to be the last time I’ll be representing Maahad in the IIU debate league. Some people said I was going to stay as a senior form 6, yeah like that’s going to happen.
By eight o’clock everyone was inside the main hall, we went about searching for our table, table number 24 and 23. It was in the middle, a perfect view, behind the VIP table. Everyone was pulling chairs and greeting the other school, everyone in their best outfit for tonight.
Suddenly out of nowhere Raihan and Amira stumbled upon Iman. She wore her green baju batik from KISAS, the little juniors were pulling her to come and meet the Hamidians debate team. She said hi to me then going to the part of how was our training. Raihan replied with a quick say on how great and how awesome debate was, she even told her about our friendly match with SSP Kuala Lumpur. Iman made a motherly look face at me, one that mothers would do to their child if they misbehave in a funny way.
“You bullied them”
“No I didn’t”, I replied.
“Did he bully you?” Iman ask towards Amira and Raihan.
They made a small childish smile, trying to answer that ridiculous question.
“There, there, there, he bullied you, I just left you for a month and you start bullying them”
The statement was so straight that I felt I wanted to murder her. Who was the one who left? Who was the one who dumped 13 newbie? Who was the one who said they could actually beat other SBP schools? It wasn’t me, that was sure, and now she was talking to me like this. I just gave back a faint smile.
Iman went back to her KISAS colleges, one thing I’m thankful is that Iman hasn’t been brainwashed by KISAS, she’s still the Iman I knew.
Back to the grand dinner, the food of course was hand- licking, I ate with my hands as usual, while all the people around us was eating with spoons and forks, that was a Maahad trend in coming here. Azri Asyraf then came here; he was one of the judges of the tournament. He came to have dinner himself, he didn’t standing all night while everyone was eating, that’s Asyraf. With some mocking words like “it’s hard”, “it’s hard” he sat at one of the empty chairs around our table and took his own share of food. He commented about my team and how in the world am I going to win. It was a laugh.
The slideshow was spectacular, although it made your
adrenaline rush; it was no match with last year’s. Last year’s slideshow made you fuel up with adrenaline that by the end of it someone actually shouted in excitement.
I looked at the top of the stage, there it was the Tun Sri Lanang championship cup, and this year the prize money was worth RM 3000. How much further could it go? The cup was worthless, what’s worth was the glory of debating in the finals.
The grand dinner has ended; the ushers were passing some sheets of paper to the contestants. Wonder what it is? I took one, and to my curiosity it was a new timetable for the championship. I was totally shocked when I saw it; base on this new timetable, there would be only 6 preliminary rounds with two double-octo rounds.
Back in my room I quickly called Wani telling her about this. If this timetable was true(which I think is) then Wani would not be able to debate during the preliminary rounds because for the next two days she would be at SBPI Gombak. I went frantic. What was it actually? Was I doomed to be like? Wani calmed me down; she said she’ll think up of something.
I sat by my bed thinking what in the world am I suppose to do. There is a slim chance that if I was able, I could train Hafeeza tonight and make sure she was well prepared for tomorrow. Slim idea, not to mention selfish, but
what other choice did I had?
Without long, the girls called me via Amira’s hand phone. They willingly wanted to do a training tonight. Loudspeaker I think was on because I could hear Raihan’s and Hafeeza’s voice beyond the hand phone. I was totally in relief. I quickly said to the others to pack whatever things that were necessary and met at the front gate as usual. Arif and Azizul was a bit tired so they ran late.
While I was walking towards the front gate, I called the girls. They were a bit surprise at how fast I was moving.
“Dah solat ke?”
The question was a rhetoric one, you shouldn’t ask these type of questions to girls Nafeesa once told me.
“No, why?”
“Well don’t you want to go and pray first?”
“After this”, I said. I was already half way towards the front gate.
Raihan made a quick talk that I should go and pray first, and that I should go and get some rest, what empathy I thought. But maybe there was truth in her words; I was pushing myself a little too hard this year, not just me, my teammates too. A split decision was made, get back to the room get some rest for tomorrow and train during the mock debate. The words of Raihan were still imbued with excitement.
I walk back to my room, hand phone in hand. Thinking back of what I just heard. I sat on a chair. I was a little confused with the way Raihan spoke, was it excitement, hope, empathy or fear. Among all of my teammates, Raihan was the most emotional; I knew there was something in her voice. Was she afraid of me? Was she afraid that I’ll do something bad or get angry if she didn’t win nor did her best tomorrow? Maybe, I thought, she still had the fears from the previous debate with SSP where she wasn’t able to deliver a full speech. Is she trying to pay back the debt I did for doing the reply speech?
I sat thinking, maybe I haven’t realized it before, but in the eyes of Hafeeza, Amira, Azizul, Arif, just like Raihan, there were those faint glows. Was it hope? Did they understand what I was going through and wanted to make up for me? Their behavior in IIU proved a lot, they weren’t themselves. By the moment we step on IIU, they were excited, willing to learn, risk taking and if I could interpret right, hopeful, but for what reasons I don’t know. I always wanted to know what was the reason, the real reason, people like Raihan, Hafeeza, Wani or Ariffudin could have an interest in English debate. That’s something that was different between me and them; I was forced into debate, brutally trained and then when I wanted to let go, debate suddenly became a passion then into a skill, and now it’s my destiny.
What was the reason………………….
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